Hermipunzel?
by marissala
Summary: Basically, Harry Potter meets Rapunzel. Hermione is trapped in a tower by Voldemort, Harry rescues her, yatta yatta. Apparently not as original as I thought it was... Definetly NOT a romance.


Disclaimer: I don't even pretend to own Harry Potter, or any of the characters, places, things, etc. that are part of it, nor do I pretend to own Rapunzel. They aren't mine.

And yes, this is basically a Harry Potter version of Rapunzel. I'm not a Harry/Hermioine shipper (I'm not delusional...), nor am I really a Hermione/Krum shipper... you'll see. But it's not even remotely canon. What did you expect?

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Once upon a time, in a far away kingdom, lived a married couple, Mr. and Mrs. Granger. The Grangers were poor, and they were muggles, but they were happy. One day, Mrs. Granger got deathly ill, but the only thing that could cure her was the leaf of the Hermipunzel plant. The only place that poor Mr. Granger could get the roots from this plant were in town (for a rather hefty price, of course), or in the garden of the evil, reclusive wizard Voldemort. Voldemort rarely went into his garden, so Mr. Granger simply snuck over the wall and took the leaves. He brewed them into a tea, and soon Mrs. Granger was better. 

However, it wasn't long until poor Mrs. Granger fell ill once again. This time she needed the stalk of the Hermipunzel plant. So, knowing there were no consequences last time, Mr. Granger again climbed Voldemort's wall, snuck into his garden, and stole the necessary part of the plant. Upon returning home, he gave the stalks to Mrs. Granger. Soon she was well again. Soon Mr. and Mrs. Granger received an unexpected visitor. Voldemort had come to their house, and, in the middle of the night, he warned them never to come to his garden again. If they did, there would be dire consequences to pay.

For a long time afterwards, the Grangers lived in peace and happiness. However, she fell ill again. This time it was the root of the Hermipunzel plant she needed. Mr. Granger knew that if he went into Voldemort's garden again it may mean death, but his wife was dying, and he had to take the chance. So, he again climbed the wall and went to dig up the plant. This time, though, Mr. Granger soon found a wand. And it was pointing straight at his face.

"Hello, Mr. Granger. I warned you. I told you if you ever returned to my garden, there would be hell to pay. However, I know your wife is deadly ill, and I can be merciful when the mood strikes me. You may take the plant, Mr. Granger. Return to your wife. Make her well again. I may spare your lives right now, Mr. Granger, but in payment for the plants that you have taken, your first born child is mine."

And with that, the wizard was gone. Mr. Granger quickly returned home to his wife with the plant, and upon taking the medicine that had been made from it, she soon became well, and did not fall ill again. Soon, Mrs. Granger gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby girl. But before the new parents could begin celebrating, Voldemort arrived. In their happiness, the Grangers forgot all about their deal. They begged Voldemort not to take their daughter; he could have the next one. But Voldemort wanted this one, and that had been the deal, so this one he took. He named her Hermipunzel, after the plant her parents had taken. However, not overly happy with that name, he nicknamed her Hermione.

Hermione was to be Voldemort's perfect Death Eater... other than the fact that she was a filthy mud-blood, of course. But, if he merely kept that fact to himself, who would know? However, Hermione was an ill-disciplined child. She refused to accept his evil, Death Eater ways, so Voldermort promptly locked her in a tower to teach her a lesson. And to stop her from running away. However, Hermione was also a witch, and a highly skilled one at that. She was always unlocking the door, so Voldemort took away the stairs to the tower and forced her to grow her hair long and plait it into a very long braid so he could climb up it to visit her. Hermione was locked in this tower from the age of twelve, and remained there until the present day, at the age of seventeen.

One day (that day being today, as in right now), a young prince somehow stumbled upon Hermipunzel's tower. This was prince Harry (not THAT prince Harry...), heir to the throne of the kingdom of number twelve, Grimmauld Place, London, and one of the heirs to the throne of the magnificent castle of Hogwarts. He had gotten lost in the forest, and saw a wizard climbing up what appeared to be a very bushy, brown vine. Naturally curious, Harry waited until a little while after the wizard climbed down, and approached the bottom of the tower.

"Hermipunzel, Hermipunzel, let down your hair." Harry had no idea what this meant. He had just heard the wizard yell it, and then the vine had come down. So, Harry wasn't surprised when the vine came down at him. Upon climbing up it, however, he did receive a shock.

"Wait a second... this is hair! Human hair! Good Lord... I'm climbing up hair!" Quickly recovering from this shock, Harry climbed up the rest of the hair, and entered the tower.

"Who are you?" Upon hearing this beautifully melodic voice, Harry turned around, and saw the most beautiful girl he had ever seen... "You can't come up here! I'm not allowed to have anyone else up here! Get out, quick! I can't break the rules!" Although she rushed him out the window, Harry didn't care. He had found out what the evil wizard was keeping in his tower, and he fell in love with her.

Harry returned to the tower often, and every time he did so the girl would give him a stern talking to. Harry loved every minute of it. Gradually, Harry's lectures got longer and longer, until one day he stayed so long that Voldemort returned before he had left.

"Hermipunzel, Hermipunzel, let down your hair!" He cried form the bottom of the tower. Hermione and Harry scrambled for a place to hide him. Eventually, they just threw him under the bed, and Hermione rushed to get her hair out the window. Voldemort slowly climbed up, causing much stress on poor Hermipunzel's scalp, and causing her to wince.

"Why did you take so long? Do you not usually come right away? Don't you!" Voldemort was enraged. He started to scream. A terrible noise, really. But he gave poor Hermipunzel more than just a stern talking to. He screamed at her, hit her, just generally beat her up. He is evil after all. Once he left (and in a rage, too), Harry quickly got out from under the bed.

"You must go. I... I can't break the rules. You have to leave. Now. And please, promise me you'll never come back." Hermione was sitting on top of the bed, which made it rather hard for Prince Harry to get out, but he managed. He was shocked to see her crying.

"Please, Hermipunzel, don't cry. I'll get you out of here. I'll get us both out of here. This is what we'll do..." And so they conducted a plan, staying up until all hours of the night to finish it. Come morning, it was near completion.

"Hermipunzel, let down your hair right now!" Voldemort yelled. He was still angry from the previous evening. Fortunately for them, Hermipunzel and Harry's plan had already been finished, so they got into position, Hermione at the window, and Harry sitting on the bed. Voldemort quickly climbed up her hair, glad to see that she had obeyed him immediately this time.

"It is a good thing, girl, that you obeyed... who the hell are you?" Voldemort asked upon arrival. Voldemort had now seen Harry. Hermione could only hope their plan would work, "No matter who you are. You're up in her tower! You will die for this! _Avada Ked_..." Voldemort screamed, wand pointed at Harry. However, before he could quite get the words out, Harry and Hermoine's plan went in action.

"EXPELLIARMUS!" Harry yelled, a little loudly, to disarm the wizard.

"Petrificus totalus!" Hermipunzel said at the same time, though not nearly as loudly. Voldemort, the evil wizard that kept Hermipunzel caged for so long was now petrified on the tower floor, so Hermione and Harry took this opportunity to escape. Hermione cut her humongous, bushy braid off so that her hair only fell to her shoulders, and after climbing down the braid, Harry and Hermione rode off into the sunset, off to Hogwarts.

When they arrived, Harry had planned to confess his love to the beautiful, bushy-haired Hermipunzel, but found that she soon fell for the foreign knight, Sir Viktor Krum, and ran off with him to his castle in a far away kingdom. His heart broken into an innumerable number of pieces, Harry quickly fell into despair.

After months and months of wallowing in sadness and self-pity, Harry stumbled upon Draco, the heir to a rather large fortune and title, and another one of the heirs to the Hogwarts castle and fortune. Originally mortal enemies, these two heirs soon found they had more in common than they had originally thought ( wink, wink...).

And they all lived happily ever after. Except for poor Sir Ronald, the impoverished knight who couldn't even manage to arrive on time to be in the story. He was supposed to sweep Hermipunzel off her feet, but on his way to the castle his horse was brutally beaten by a giant white chess piece. Sir Ronald was so startled, he didn't even get a good look at the thing. He believes it was a Queen, but there is no way to know for certain. Anyway, Sir Ronald is not one to give up easily, so he carried his injured horse to the castle. He still did not arrive in time to be in the story, and also sustained serious injury to his back (well, that's what happens when you carry a horse on your back like you're the horse and it's the rider).

The End.


End file.
